Announcement of Worf's Shimoda triumph in the Greatest Generation Facebook group (09-27-17)


Shimoda Power Rankings over the course of The Greatest Generation, as compiled by @colindinsmore

Worf was the overall winner of Drunk Shimoda awards over the course of the TNG series. Riker and Picard came in second and third, respectively. Each of the top 3 characters led the rankings at one time in the course of the podcast.

  • 31.5 - Worf
  • 28.5 - Riker
  • 28.5 - Picard
  • 21 - Data
  • 10.5 - Dr. Crusher
  • 10.5 - Geordi LaForge
  • 8.5 - Troi
  • 6.5 - Chief O'Brien
  • 4 - Jonathan Frakes
  • 3.5 - Wesley
  • 3.5 - Dr. Pulaski
  • 3 - Brent Spiner
  • 2.5 - Ben
  • 2.5 - Tasha Yar
  • 2 - Jim Shimoda
  • 2 - Patrick Stewart
  • 1 - Marina Sirtis
  • 0.5 - Adam

TNG Episodes

TNG Episode
Ben's Drunk Shimoda Ben's Reason
Adam's Drunk Shimoda Adam's Reason

Season One

I Don't Feel Comfortable With Children
(Jellyfish aliens) (for being horny the instant they get free
(Q) (Because Q is always having the most fun)
Drunk Shimoda
Jim Shimoda
Jim Shimoda
Troi For having no motivation
Hagon For yelling during the fight
The A-Team of Away Teams
Portal Character For being ridiculous
Tasha Yar For confidently getting into a 1-3 standoff w/ Ferengis
Generally Human
Random crew member in hallway of fire For having to "put the flame out in your thoughts!"
Ben For re-naming himself "Wesley" at summer camp
Fish vs. Dog
Alien Delegates For acting childish
Tasha Yar For not doing anything to stop Picard from acting crazy or the aliens from killing each other
Rockin' Knuck
Dr. Crusher For injecting emotion into decisions
Lead Edo guy For talking about rules for swinging
You're Welcome, Ladies
Picard [Hon. Mention: Wesley] For obliviousness to his mind control [For saying "You're welcome, ladies"]
Dr. Crusher For not relieving Picard from command
Who's The Big Dog Now?
-- --
Riker For turning down the power of Q
The Bayless Connection
Mr. Homn For actually being drunk and not talking until he says "Thank you for the drinks" to Picard
Mr. Homn [Same]
The Ultimate Redshirt
Geordi LaForge For not doing anything to get the crew out of the holodeck
Data [Half-Shomoda: Picard] For not picking up social cues [for not saying anything to Data]
The Legend of Argyle
Picard For ignoring the security threat posed by Lore
Wesley For not stopping himself from yelling at the Captain
This Isn't A Plot, This Is A Holodeck Program!
Tasha Yar/Troi For giggling at Riker for his revealing outfit
Riker For confidence and pretending he's not going to sleep with the leader of Angel One
Going Number Three
Data For saying he should never take time off work
Leader of Starbase For letting the Enterprise be stolen
Soft Food and Laxatives
Admiral Jameson For ridiculous makeup and acting
[No one] Because no one has fun in this episode
Horn of Plenty
Radue, Aldean leader For coming up with the plan to steal children assuming that the Enterprise would be ok with it
Ron Jones (score composer) For writing a treacly score that sounds like an electro ice cream truck
The Takeover
The Microbrain For belligerence despite being totally powerless
Old Lady Ensign in Engineering For starting her career over again later in life
Chaotic Bro
Remmick For requesting an Enterprise assignment from Picard after being a dick to everyone onboard
Remmick [Same reason]
A Warrior Is Coming
Data For walking through a hot, radioactive corridor
Korris For not doing the warrior yell when Konmel died
The Clearasil of Freedom
Holographic Salesman For being excited that he got the sale
Picard For being happy that he could go on an away mission
Interplanetary Rubberband Men
The Scene where Wesley asks why people do drugs --
[Same] --
Metamucil and Printer Ink
Leland T. Lynch For constantly repeating his full name
[Too distraught to find a Shimoda] --
The Riker Collection
Picard For ghosting on Jenice
Jenice For not being upset that Picard ghosted on her
Effectively Gross
The Random yellowshirt Lieutenant who eats bugs with the admirals For perhaps just trying to suck up to them
Picard For confidence beaming down to Starfleet w/ no weapon or plan
Five Dollar Carnival Guitar
Sonny Clemonds For wanting to party while the Romulans threaten the ship
Sonny Clemonds For wanting to drink as soon as he's thawed out

Season Two

Worf Don't Preach
Hester Dealt For never being very worried about the containment
Worf For lack of subtlety in suggesting Troi have an abortion, and for having chest hair puffs
The Inbred Q
Data For calmly absorbing Pulaski's brazen bigotry
Haskell the Redshirt For dying after one line
A Long Walk for a Dick Joke
Dr. Pulaski For taking no action after being captured
Geordi LaForge For extreme mood swings
No Joke Is Getting Out Alive
The Group Therapy Scene For weird dialogue and bad blocking
Data For trying too hard
Dick Valet
Picard For saying "Cluck cluck cluck. You're being a mother hen."
The Dick Valet For getting hired to be a dick valet
A Case of the Spaceys
Riker For randomly/falsely telling Data he wrestled a targ while blacked out
Graves For wanting immortality only so he could fuck his assistant
Space Mengele
Picard For saying "extraordinary" when hearing that Pulaski had admired him
Chief O'Brien For his technobabble speech
2 Chaotic 2 Bro
Mendon For awkwardness
Riker For going full Klingon
Data's Reproductive Rights
Admiral Nakamura For appearing in the beginning and then ghosting when controversy arises
Captain Louvois For being "on the prowl" for Picard
Wesley's Chick Magnet
Riker For his "flirting" scene with Guinan
Guinan For her "flirting" scene with Riker
Fleet of Dorks
Data For the way he throws Geordi off of the electrical force
Data Sticking his arm through the gateway
Pajama Bottom Dumpy
Worf For trying to push through a wall
Col. Richey For staying alive so long
Malibu Picard
Chief O'Brien For showing up in the shuttlebay at the end and having no lines for 3 minutes
Dr. Pulaski For bringing booze to "breakfast"
Klingon Bar Mitzvah
Chief O'Brien For being up for anything in Ten-Forward
Kyle Riker For showing up to surprise his estranged son
An Appropriate Mount
Worf For getting lippy with Data
Sarjenka's parents For not noticing their daughters conversations with Data
Karate Stance Bean Flickin'
Ensign Gomez For spilling a drink on Picard and hanging out in engineering like Shimoda did
Riker For (in Adam's mind) checking whether any of the Borg babies were his
USS Dumpy
Surgeon For wild overconfidence followed by panix
Wesley For saying "where women are concerned I'm in complete control"
Diminished in Ways We Can't Even Imagine
Dr. Pulaski For trying to bang Worf w/ the tea ceremony
Dr. Pulaski/ Producers who still think this was a good episode --
Covered in a Fish
Picard For calling Data to get him out of the date with Lwaxana
Mick Fleetwood For playing an anonymous Antedean in fish costume to get a special credit on Star Trek
Level 69
Worf For losing his cool during the meeting
Worf For actually getting command of the Enterprise for his charade (1/2 Shimoda to Picard for giving it)
A Tat for Every Tit
Ensign Burke For letting Wesley steal antimatter
Worf For his continuing gambling problem
Terrible, Terrible Clip Show
Ben & Adam For not realizing how self-congratulutory the podcast would be for this one
Rob Bowman For not crediting himself as Alan Smithee

Season Three

Thinking About Baseball
The Bridge Crew For getting gassed w/o saying anything
Dr. Crusher For taking time to have a heart-to-heart about Wesley in the middle of a crisis
One Terrible Element
Riker For telling Data to use his "fancy electronic brain" to solve his problems
Ben For putting this episode (Ensigns of Command, S3E02) in his Top 10
Space Weasel
Rishon Uxbridge For lack of concern about how she survived an attack that killed everything else on her planet
Redshirt Extra For some unphysical space work during a space battle
Hella Conservative
Chief Anthropologist For wanting them to hand down religious commandments and leave
Picard For beaming up Nuria to the Enterprise--where everything looks like magic
Ghost Mom
The Aliens who created the ghost mom For having no real plan
Worf For breaking news of his mother's death to the kid at his school while covered in blood
Slathered in Middler
Riker For belatedly mentioning to Picard all the problems he missed
Picard For assigning only Geordi to work on saving the ship
Secretly Jacked
Worf For not halping the dying Romulan
Worf [Same reason]
Speaking of Feet
Episode itself For being terrible
Episode itself [Same reason]
Pre-Enlightenment French Nobility-Type Poison Fears
Yuta For acting too subservient to sleep w/ Riker
Troi For momentarily considering 3-way w/ Riker and Yuta (in Adam's imagination)
Cuban Missile Crisis in Space
Jarok For talking shit to Worf while on an enemy ship
Data For immediately abandoning his mission to make a record of what led up to war with the Romulans
The Supersoldiers Have Come Home to Roost
Farmer Hoggett (Nayrok) For never covering up for his planet's behavior
Guy on table in engineering For being sprawled out on a table in engineering
Wet Jerky
Worf For not being ready with a phaser and doing nothing
Finn For choosing a weird time to show his art to people
XXXL Merkin
Bre-el Scientists For doing almost nothing to prevent their planet being hit by a moon
Corbin Bernsen For appearing in an uncredited role
I Hate Manure
Data For his review of Picard's painting
The concept that Riker would kill someone for a woman when he could clearly find someone else to sleep with --
Sinister Turtlenecks
Lt. Castillo For transparently wanting to die in battle with Yar
Lt. Castillo For not caring that Yar has years of future experience over him when he becomes captain
Android Splash
Jonathan Frakes [Same]
Jonathan Frakes For his performance when kissed by Lal
Backyard Benihana
Kahlest For living in obscurity while knowing many prominent Klingons
Picard For the hubris to walk through Klingon slums
So, This Monica Lewinski
Picard's Doppelganger For acting weird despite seemingly knowing much about the ship and crew
Patrick Stewart For the fun he has playing the Captain's doppelganger
Captain's Knuck
Picard For looking at a lady's butt
Patrick Stewart For being game for acting ridiculous
Space Pinecone
Data For painting a space butthole
Riker & Picard For spinning instead of being thrown around during a banger shot
Magazine in the Woods
[Same] --
Dwight Schultz For his excellent performance
Data For trying to imitate Mona Lisa's smile
Data For saying "loolooloo" while feeding a hand-puppet bird
Kool-Aid Jacuzzi
Sakkath For trying to be sneaky in conversation despite being a Vulcan
The moment where Geordi talks to a kid at the Ten-Forward bar For being inexplicable (19 min)
Yub Yub
[Shimodas withheld due to terribleness of episode] --
-- --
Mount Knuckmore
Worf For bragging about teaching Geordi how to talk to women
Wolf [Same reason]
Nice Implants
Dr. Crusher For marveling at the pyramid devices on the Borg ship
Picard For sitting with his legs crossed during a battle

Season Four

The Hammer Loop
Wesley For giving Riker an incredulous look when ordered to ram the cube
Jonathan Frakes For showing that he could have been a decent captain
No Pathos in a Bowl Cut
French Mayor For wanting to give Picard the key to the city after he had been Locutus
French Mayor [Same reason]
You Never Go Full Clipshow
Worf For reacting angrily to having his security clearance blocked
Noonian Soong For acting drunk and having a giant cocktail shaker
The Gordian Sock
Capt. Endar For having a long rat-tail
The scene where Jono and Endar are re-united For having Picard and Troi just walk to the other side of the room and turn around
The Most Suggestive Instrument
Picard For not reacting when Wesley and the Traveller use magic
Picard --
It's That Tight
The Kidnapped Crewmember For being in a generic kidnapping video
The Scene where Ishara and Data talk on the bridge For having Worf just stare intensely at them
The P'tachlin Group
The Extra in the Gowron-Duras fight scene For not knowing how to hold a phaser (at 24:23)
Security Officer For being tricked by Duras's goon's "look over there!" trick
The Fart Cave
Ferengi Helmsman For spending all that time in makeup without having a line
Jonathan Frakes Pronunciation of 'charade'
A Smattering of Loaf
Geordi LaForge For letting Dirgo's ship pass inspection
Capt. Dirgo For dying predictably
A Hat Big Enough For The Occasion
The Deceased Husband of Troi's Patient For having a creepy music box as his last possession left on the ship
The Wasted Opportunity to Develop Wes's Replacement For giving her a bunch of lines and then (probably) never using her again
Chiaroscuro, All The Way Down
Data's Hairline For moving about an inch as his expression changes (3m)
Boob Tea The scene where Troi makes tea, for being shot very suggestively
A Honda Del Sol-Type Starship
Chief O'Brien For having a career trajectory where he goes from tactical officer to transporter chief
Riker For staring intently at Picard as O'Brien explains his transporter plan (37m)
Rotten with Ziggurats
Ventaxian President For believing anyone with a forceful point of view
Picard For doing a "boner lean" to obscure the boner Ardra gave him
Buffalo Troi Voice
Worf For trying to run up to possessed Troi to stun her instead of just shooting her from across the room
Security officer escort For attempting to guard against Data even though there is nothing she'd be able to do to subdue him
It's Why You Join Starfleet
Riker For trying to pretend he wasn't trying to throw a bench through a window
Lanel the horny nurse For managing to fuck an alien
So Zesty
Worf For rolling his eyes when Picard *now* wants to put up the shields
Leah Brahms For not going to Starfleet HR about Geordi's creep show
It Isn't Quite Spooky But It Is Upsetting
Data For cutting off Dr. Crusher to quickly re-explain what she is trying to say
The moment when Guinan shoots a rifle at the ceiling For having a weird glitter effect and raising questions about why Guinan has an alien rifle
Pretty Chill for Assimilating Aliens
Lt. Cmdr. Susanna Leijten For her hilarious collapse in engineering
The moment when they abruptly abandon hope for rescuing the other humans-turned-alien-mutants --
A Special, Weird Kind of Losing
Worf For ordering a security officer to take a run at Barkley's force field
Lack of security measures/Troi --/For asking Barkley out after he changes
Duke Gingersnap
Worf For being rude when Riker introduces Vash to him on the bridge
The idea of giving the female characters potted plants instead of weapons --
More Labial Than Chihuly
Admiral Henry For meaningfully leaving the trial without saying a word
Admiral Henry [Same]
Not Quite as Boob-y
Picard For sheepishly exiting a turbolift, on the lookout for Lwaxana
Dara (Michelle Forbes) For out-acting her hair
Confiding in a Blender
Dr. Crusher For feeling that it was necessary to lie to Data about the fact that she and Odan were about to bone
The Pan Flute Music whenever the Trill speaks For condescending spirituality
That's How You Grow Creepy Chickens
Geordi LaForge For having a tiki drink in his shuttle in the morning
Fake Geordi For looking nothing like his counterpart
Canadian Cute
O'Brien & Keiko For immediately fighting with each other when sitting with Data & Jenna in Ten Forward
Riker For talking loud over the communicator like an old person using the phone
Love Those Puffs
Toral For nearly being late to challenge Gowron’s installation as chancellor
Picard For insisting on speaking Klingon, badly, at every opportunity

Season Five

The Phoenix Problem
The Romulan guard left behind at the Duras house on Qo'nos after all the other Romulans have fled --
Hobson For not standing up to Data
Hiding the Judd
Picard For shooting a mean look at O’Brien after being beamed up for the first attempted beam-up in the middle of the fight
Riker For guessing with no evidence that the Tamarians wouldn’t destroy a shuttle sent down to the planet
BONUS: Prop Department For giving Patrick Stewart the action jacket
The Shelby Treatment
The actor playing Admiral Kennelly For making a silly expression in his last shot
Whoever distributes phasers For sending Troi down to a hostile planet as the only one without a phaser
The Pudding Button
Riker Folding his phaser so it looked like an erection in profile
Riker For being off-balance responding to Carmen’s intense flirtation with him/handling her flirtation like an Akido master
A Tour of Bangers
Guy attempting to put chess game back together during attack [Recurs in ep. 114]
Riker For getting consent to use Data's body to absorb electricity
Werebear PTSD
Worf For scene when he crawls through the Jeffrey's tube
Worf For the show not giving him the scene where he succumbs to the game
Fractionally Loafier
Data For scene where he stands awake as Picard attempts to sleep
Picard For big-dogging Capt. K'Vada as he attempts to describe how unpleasant the Klingon ship should be for humans
A Pun Hiding in Plain Sight
Data For deadpanning "perhaps you would be happier in another job" to Rom-Yar-lan
Riker For marching into the space cantina in uniform and grabbing a drink off of a waiter's tray
A Big Fan of Scarcity
Rick Berman (episode writer) For forgetting major aspects of how the crew acts
Rasmussen's racist remark Tells Asian kid to "keep your eyes wide" [Shimoda gross, not funny]
Male Pattern Loaf
Troi For telling Worf "I'm not here to approve or disapprove of how you raise your son" despite doing just that the whole ep
Riker For unconvincing tumble during a banger
Thrift Store Data
Timothy For falling asleep during heart-to-heart with Data
Troi For encapsulating her character with a line about getting out of the way of the action
Hundred Proof Star Trek
Riker For being disgusted by Tarmin's lack of interest in consent (thus retroactively justifying Greatest Gen's running joke)
Geordi LaForge For talking into a butt
Alt Biosphere
Hannah For saying "would you ever live in a ship in a bottle, captain?" unknowingly to a captain who loves ships in bottles
Crickets For existing in a perfectly-engineered biosphere
Lipizzaner Stallions All the Way Down
Worf For his look of confusion when hearing their real ranks/his worfeyes when McDuff suggests a mutiny
Picard For the way that he gradually increases shields as danger increases
The Polar Region
Worf For saying "you have no idea" to Data when being praised for his restraint for not hurting Data
The civilian evacuating 10-Forward in Bugle Boy pants [same as Ben's chess Shimoda in ep. 104]
Didn't Even Consider the Bangers
Nurse Ogawa For the parsimonious distribution of her lines in this episode in observation of union rules
Back surgery prop? Dr. Russell? Unknown. [Discussion devolves into conversation about anal play without resolution]
The Husk Shot is Verboten
The Poker Scene For bad characterization (Worf's inexplicable misogyny)
Riker For referencing the "starboard manhole thruster"
A Previa Dealership
Picard / Dr. Crusher For being 3 whiskeys deep in his ready-room / For having a tank of Barbicide in her quarters
This Chair How do you sit in this thing?
Resting Grief Face
Satelk (the Vulcan Captain) For his "aww, yeah!" face when Wesley confesses
The Cargo Pants worn by Starfleet cadets --
Mud Bath Nightmare
Mr. Homn For the approving look he gives Lwaxana
The Costumers For leaving one of Picard's rank pip's off his collar in the turbolift scene
No More Lead in the Pencil
Kamala For casually mentioning that she plays all musical instruments
Riker For his genuine embarrassment at being seduced by Kamala and having to take a "cold shower" on the holodeck
Queen of the Slickbacks
Troi For her dagger eyes when Guinan tries to usurp her counselor duties
Worf For seeming proud of himself when he sends the kids back to their quarters
You Don't Name The Cow
Hugh For having stubble on his face in his scene with the captain
Security officer in the brig For wearing high dad pants
Grief Procrastination
Geordi For his dopey Han Solo look while confused
Worf For winkingly making sure that they give the Romulans a shitty older computer instead of a new one
You Do Not Want to Get the Creams Confused
The Probe’s Plan to keep the memory of these people alive Because when Picard dies, the memory of these people die!
Guy from Central Government For completely squandering any chance to save the planet
The Manure is the Only Thing That's Missing
Mark Twain For eavesdropping on people he is 5 ft from, while smoking a cigar
Data For not knowing when to conceal his future/android identity

Season Six

Mad Pleating
Chief O’Brien For only existing in this episode through use of his name
Worf For his (sadly never seen) days in command of the ship, as Captain Worf
Legit Fangoria
Worf For saying “a mouth?” in disgust)
Chief O'Brien For having to act like he’s been woken up to speak w/ Barclay and showing him his spider
A Funereal Disease
"The Hands of the Dead” For freezing in place after the “old” woman dies, and after Alkar transforms
The Turbolift Ensign For sleeping with Troi and then sheepishly leaving her quarters as Riker shows up
The Good Chills
Ensign Hospitality For his role in Starfleet being basically hotel duty
Scotty For getting shithouse drunk with Picard and having a wicked hangover
Munch Longevity
Woman at Poetry Reading For the camera lingering at her very long despite having no lines
Khaki Pants Guy For lurking around the background of the reading
The Deep End of the Pool
Foreground Extra For not being able to fully rush into the scene when an accident happens (like an AI character with a repetitive pattern of movement)
Riker For falling into a room around 21 min and playing it off
Captain Potter
Ferengi Guarding the Transporter Room For bending over to closely inspect the remote control car sent to distract him
Data For being uncharacteristically slow to respond to attacks
Back to the Future-Level Breast Loaf
Brent Spiner For incredible scene-chewing in all his additional roles
Brent Spiner For his Nicolas Cage impression while shuffling cards & and having surprisingly hairy forearms
Business Casual Station
The random guy who swoops in to gather up the exocomp after it comes out of the tunnel with exploding rocks For coming out of nowhere
[Same] --
A Reverence for the D
Worf For standing silently over Crusher's shoulder as she seductively manipulates the Ferengi captain
Ronnie Cox (as Jellico) For swooping in out of nowhere to take over the show
No Stranger to Terrible Implants
Gul Madred For being defied/embarrassed a few times and selling it
Capt. Jellico For lack of self-awareness and saying "maybe a little better" about the state of the ship as he gives it back to Picard
He's A Real Evil Boy
To the security guy testing multiple parts of the force field For his powerful mime work
[Same] --
Pretty Rough for a First Timer
Worf For accusing the Klingon Governor of being a "lo'Be Vos"
Riker For assigning Geordi to the investigation
Li'lest Breadbox
Troi For (as Tromulan) reaching for her giant empty gun holster as if she couldn't tell it was empty
Marina Sirtis For getting to finally be all over an episode and do a bunch of fun acting stuff
The Bell Curve of Mountain to Armus
Background character in bar scene For appearing to have been dressed from the middle ages
Cory For the way he says "he was controlling the balls!"
He's Not My Android
Dr. Bashir For wearing white hospital shoes
Wobbly Ten-Forward table For wobbling out of fear to what happened to the glass table in Worf's quarters
LoJack Worf
Toq For saying "the hunt? we have replicators!"
Gi'ral (Tokath's Wife) for having a pink Klingon bathrobe
A Man, A Plan, A Barion Sweep - Entrepreneur!
Brent Spiner For his incredibly hammy acting in his "small talk" scenes
Riker For choosing "getting beaten up" as a method of distraction
Planet Scorcher
Troi For slickly being onto Picard's affair, especially in the background of the concert
Engineer in Engineering For wordlessly dismissing the sound of music which can be hearing through the Jeffrey's Tubes
You'll Know We've Reached the Bottom
Klingon Guzman (Nu'Daq) For immediately challenging (and losing) a contest of strength to Data
Klingon Guzman (Nu'Daq) For that and general hamminess
(A Man With) Very Suspicious Loaf
Suna For leaving the unconscious Riker alone with a knife, his communicator and no shackles
Riker For being proud that his mental strength saved him
Aggressively Flavorless
Dr. Crusher For being surprised Guinan would come give her advice under a false pretense
Jo'bril For a preposterous fall in the shuttlecraft fight scene
Just For Mensign
Dee Giffin Scott (uncredited Klingon Pilgrim) For her (clearly self-written) IMDb bio
Old Ensign For being unable to act in scenes where people are talking about him
A Throbbing, Turgid McGuffin
Geordi For not caring that someone left a note on the warp core
Geordi For even letting Thomas Riker into engineering so he could leave it
Trucker Hand
Picard For his weird temporal narcosis moment in Engineering
Picard [Same]
Be Quiet, Grampa
Eric Estrada Security Guard At 26 min, the security guard, for immediately replacing his dead comrade out of nowhere
Picard For making many terrible decisions in a row

Season Seven

A Fun Face For Science Fiction
Lt. Barnaby For acting annoyed when Taitt's strategy blows up the Borgs ship
Geordi For stopping Data from destroying the emotion chip
Botany Babe
Data For gleefully insulting Worf without realizing it
Troi For being put upon while having to shepherd around the overly enthusiastic diplomat
A Hat Under a Hat
Data For letting Geordi attempt suicide, just as he always does
Geordi For not considering how “illogical” his mom’s reasons would be for having him risk his life
Foam Stone Holocaust
Ensign Giusti For (as a charity Shimoda which is the opposite of the usual distinction of having fun) having to thanklessly narrate what should have been a scene of starships doing things
Geordi For mirroring Riker’s “put his leg up on a rock” maneuver
Perfect Warburton
Data For Dad-joking, when Riker is stunned, that he is “experiencing a similar sensation”
Koral For slowly pouring his Klingon blood wine on the floor
A Murder Weapon Waiting to Happen
Worf For everything he does while interacting with Data's cat
Worf Because all he does in the episode is talk about watching a cat and eat a cake
All Plenty, No Horn
The Props Department For splashing out on an incredibly lavish horn of plenty (seen at 16:05)
[NONE] This episode is joyless
Prick For Prick
Ambassador Mauric For playing a weird middle point between self-assuredness, officiousness, paranoia, and desperation
Dr. Crusher For pushing PIcard through the portal even though they're psychically connected and they'll both instantly become nauseous for hours
A Very Pronounced Headmouth
The Writers For telegraphing the meaning of the episode with lines like "Our climate is changing"
Serova For overly theatrically appearing to "think" when addressed
The Symphony of My Life is Flatulance
Dr. Juliana Tainer For spending decades without reaching out to Data
Lady wearing a birthday hat in Ten Forward For wearing a weird birthday hat thing during a solumn recital
Friends of DeSoto
Riker For letting nervous Worf walk into a surprise party with a bunch of sharp objects
Dr. Crusher For nodding thoughtfully along in McLaughlan group where Data explains bonkers quantum many-worlds scenario like it isn't bonkers
Spit Roast Big Dogging
Riker For his Captain Picard Day antics at the beginning of the episode
Riker [Same]
Any Pixel in a Storm
The Hair Department In the scene where the Chronicle-r goes to Ten Forward, for giving multiple women bonkers curly hair (28 min)
The Old Guy For trying to marry his daughter to Worf
Leotard Conversation
Dr. Crusher For reading "a particularly erotic chapter" of her grandmother's journal
Dr. Crusher [Same]
A Greek Chorus Noxzema Commercial Kids
Sam Lavelle For making the post-Sito-death hang in Ten Forward all about himself
Sam Lavelle For thrusting himself into an awkward conversation with Riker to suck up to him
Gruffness Quotient
Riker For the hammy trombone scene
Talur, the healer For having the "leech confidence" of a pre-science doctor
Emphatically Vaginal
Picard For geeking out over ancient alien artifacts while the ship is in great danger
Geordi and Worf For beaming away from a fire in Engineering and making no effort to put it out
Taking It Out on the Wall
Lt. Kwan For supposedly being excited to be assigned to the nacelle of the ship
Data For his condescending speech about not committing suicide
Four Octaves of Intelligence Range
The Episode For resembling a good version of The Naked Now, origin of the Drunk Shimoda
The Episode [Same]
Warp Salieri
Worf For his "we're doing this for your own good!" attitude while blasting phasers around the settlement during the fight with the Cardassians
Troi For inexplicably knowing all about the Pueblo Revolt of 1680 in order to deliver emotionless exposition
Butter Knife Bat'leth
Picard For zinging Worf about maybe re-calibrating the weapons systems (that caused the torpedo to go off-course in 'Genesis', thus eventually saving the whole crew)
Lursa & B'Etor For being broad and just the right amount of cheesy
Young Liza Minnelli & Old Billy Eichner
The Crew of the Ferengi Ship For never questioning whether Daimon Bok is a real captain
Jason's floppy dick For flopping around visibly through his pants as he writhes around on the ground during his seizure
Pizza Place Tough Guy
Worf After being told to "distract" people on the train, sits down and gets involved in a puzzle
Worf For his defeated face when ordered to go shovel holographic coal
It's Like They Skinned Rowlf
Guy who gets to smooch Ro in the bar For getting to smooch Ro in the bar
Santos For taking cover behind a single branch during a phaser attack
Greatest Generation Forever
Bent iPad Why were you bent?!
Officer in future timeline on a date in Ten-Forward who rolls his eyes and gets up and leaves when Picard is ranting For wanting the 'Picard' table to shut up


Two Captains, One Nexus
(Non main character) [Donor Bonus]
Picard [Donor Bonus]
Premature Assimilation
Troi [Donor Bonus]
(Non main character) [Donor Bonus]

1Inaugural Shimoda (pronounced "Shinoda" on this occasion)

Star Trek: The Next Generation
Episode List • Individual Episodes • Drunk Shimodas • Trading Cards
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